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Furies! - The Struggle For Growth

The science of our complex human nature is unravelling the mysteries of how we create and change experience. Furies! leverages this growing knowledge to examine how harsh events cause emotional distress and intense suffering. This book, full of examples, shows how we can change these painful experiences, create well-being and enable personal growth.

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How Loss Creates Depression And Growth

11. The capacity to tolerate distress and efficiently develop greater internal resources creates the greatest possibility for posttraumatic growth. Posttraumatic growth and posttraumatic diminishment can co-exist.

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Thursday
Jan072010

I Have An Identical Twin!

Identical twins think and feel in such similar ways that they sometimes suspect they are linked by telepathy. When separated at birth and reunited as adults, they say they feel they have know each other all their lives. Testing confirms that identical twins, whether separated at birth or not, are eerily alike (though far from identical) in just about any trait one can measure. They are similar in verbal, mathematical, and general intelligence, in their degree of life satisfaction, and in personality traits such as introversion, agreeableness, neuroticism, conscientiousness, and openness to experience. They have similar attitudes toward controversial issues such as the death penalty, religion, and modern music. They resemble each other not just in paper-and-pencil tests but in consequential behavior such as gambling, divorcing, committing crimes, getting into accidents, and watching television. And they boast dozens of shared idiosyncrasies such as giggling incessantly, giving interminable answers to simple questions, dipping buttered toast in coffee, and - in the case of Abigail van Buren and Ann Landers - writing indistinguishable syndicated advice columns. The crags and valleys of their electroencephalograms (brain-waves) are as alike as those of a single person recorded on two occasions, and the wrinkles of their brains and distribution of gray matter across cortical areas are also similar.

-Steven Pinker, The Blank Slate: The Modern Denial of Human Nature, p47

Imagine being introduced to your own long-lost identical twin! I have played with this idea for the past week, and I must say, it has not done wonders for my mental health.

I have re-read primary source materials on identical twins, and other discussions including Damasio and Haidt. Pinker provides the weightiest, most relentless summary. The alikeness is astounding.

What would your identical twin be doing now? What would be his life circumstances? How should I feel if my long-lost identical twin made life choices very similar to mine? Did he just discover me in a thought exercise and is similarly perplexed?

One of the gifts of consciousness is perspective. To watch yourself in real life, as if you have an identical twin, is a scary thought. Who would want to give up the ability to turn away and hide?

On the other hand, what if I am fascinated by his life? I might have an easier time recognizing his strengths and capacities than he would. Maybe having an identical twin is a path to great resilience and well-being.

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